I’m heading back to school on Sunday, and my parents just invested in a baby grand piano. Had to test it out before I leave. Here’s Chopin’s Prelude in B Minor and a snippet of Kiss the Rain by Yiruma.
Self critique before someone else does:
-Nails are too long
-Hands therefore are flat
-Melody is being drowned
In other news, my camera has surprisingly great video quality.
About the company: Mary & CO. was founded in 1991, originally headquartered in Omaha, NE but moved its headquarters to NYC, NY in 2009. The company prides itself on adapting quickly to the changing environment and meeting customer and employee needs. Mary & CO. gained notoriety through its straightforward analysese, no filler, no fluff, no games. Mary & CO. is also noted for its beautiful presentation and skilled performance. Mary & CO. is a well respected company with many potential clients and is always seeking the best employees. Mary & CO. is now hiring full-time for a boyfriend position.
As a boyfriend of Mary & CO., you will be required to directly assist the CEO. You are required to have an oral, manual, or physical presentation at least once a day. You may be required to work in extremely stressful and emotional situations. You must always demonstrate your conversational skills, as meals are commonly shared. You must also be comfortable with intimacy. Required commitment is minimum ten hours a week. Occasional manual labor.
Qualified individuals possess:
Workaholics are encouraged.
Disclaimer: I’m going through formal campus recruiting right now, and this idea came to mind. Also all innuendos are purposefully placed.
Everyone turns to some materialism when they’re down and out. For some, it’s food. For some, it’s chocolate, ice cream. Some go on a shopping spree.
What do I do? I buy lingerie. I drop so much money on lingerie when I’m sad, about anything. When my boyfriend broke up with me two summers ago, I bought so many new bras over that summer, I completely replaced my already existing collection. When I was upset about the situation that the most recent guy and I was in, I immediately spent well over a hundred dollars on one bra and panty set. Bad grade? Where’s the nearest Vicky’s? When I’m upset, I have no reasoning. Everything is justified when I’m upset, so all that money spent is money well wasted. Why? Because even though my life sucks, at least I know that I’m still sexy.
I can tell you exactly what instance made me buy each bra.
You know, Xanga always goes through phases. Every once in a while it’s the Asian girls want to look like White girls thing. It’s always the curvy/fat vs. skinny/anorexic theme. And right now, what I see, is the tipping thing.
Yep the tipping thing. It annoys the shit out of me that people expect to get tipped. I leave a general comment about how I don’t understand service workers’ entitlement to their tips, and that from what I know tipping doesn’t exist much elsewhere. All of Asia doesn’t tip. Australia doesn’t tip. And anywhere that does tip, it’s not expected and as generous of an amount as the United States. Well anyway, this bitch responds to my comment saying, “how so very ignorant of you.” Really? How is that even ignorant? From what I understand, tips are a special thank you. That’s why you get to denote how much tip you offer people. You get to decide how much they deserve.
I don’t work in the service industry because I hate people, but this is my general understanding of it. Food service workers tend to get really low hourly wages, but it’s not called minimum wage for nothing. You are supposed to be compensated for whatever you are short of minimum wage. I tip averagely (15%) because most service is average. If you do a good job, I’ll bump it up. If you don’t, don’t expect much in your pocket. I tip my hairdresser only if they listen well to what I want done with my hair and they perform.
That’s the thing about America. People expect much more than they deserve and get this sense of entitlement to everything. It’s so annoying. I wish I could move back to Shanghai.
If there was anything I learned in 2011, it was to be adamant in what I feel and not to be afraid to do something about it. I learned to let go of people who were deadweight in my life, when normally I would’ve kept them close. I let go of a boyfriend who I thought I loved who was in actuality selfish and a so-called best friend who was too self-absorbed to care for me as I did for him. Prior, I would’ve been too afraid to lose them. I learned to go for what I want, even though I don’t feel confident enough to succeed. I competed in the JP Morgan IB Risk case competition, with no knowledge of what risk management really was. Knowing I had to present in front of MDs was really nerve wracking but I went for it anyway, and I learned quite a bit. I got better with being afraid of looking stupid. I ask questions more often now, learning a lot, improving myself. I mean that’s what living is about.
Next year’s milestone: become more tolerant of people.
Have a happy new year, everyone!
In the dying days (months) of my last relationship, I was just generally unhappy with how I was being treated. We got into fights often over the same thing over and over again, and I asked him to change. Every time, he would say, “You shouldn’t want to change me. You should love me for who I am.” That’s one of those phrases that you really can’t respond to. Why? Because what the fuck does that even mean? It’s not that the phrase is so utterly true that there is nothing you can say back, but rather, it’s just so baffling. “You should love me for who I am” means one of two things: “You don’t love me if you want me to change,” or “You should tolerate me because you say you love me.”
While both are entirely huge guilt trips, we all know it’s the latter. After a certain point, after so many “I love you”s are exchanged, people feel entitled to their SO’s love. They feel they should be loved wholly and completely. Honestly though, no one is entitled to anything. No one should have to tolerate someone’s imperfections, especially if they’re hurtful and damaging. And no, I don’t have to love you for who you are. You will either change your habits, or I can’t be with you.
I’m not advocating changing someone’s whole person in order to be with them. I do believe you should be with someone you love, not someone you can change into someone you can love. But if someone is continually hurting you, they should see it in themselves to change, if THEY love you enough. The ball is really in their court.
Because phones aren’t for calling people anymore.
This is how I imagine my afterlife.
1. There will be warm tropical weather in the underworld. I mean, it’s basically like a volcanic island right? (eg. Hawaii)
2. The Devil will be my enabling best friend, encouraging me to do whatever I want.
3. No one to judge me because everyone else sucks too.
4. Don’t have to suck up to God anymore; he can’t smite me when I’m already in hell.
Might as well be optimistic about it, right?
Yes, I’m Vietnamese. Yes, I’m a girl, but generally I’d like to say I’m not like the rest of the Vietnamese girls in my generation. They sometimes are classified as gold-diggers. Plenty become import models. Maybe I’m just not hot enough to completely follow the stereotype, but here’s what makes me “Vietnamese.”
1. I do my own nails. I can’t make awesome designs or anything because I don’t have any dexterity or patience, but I’m good at shaping and painting. I mean hands are the first thing people notice about you right? (Minus ass and tits)
2. I drive a Civic. Hey! It’s economical and well fitting for my skill and size. Skill being bad, and size being small. But anyway it gets great gas mileage!
3. I’m good at poker.
Yep.
I was talking to my guy friend about catcalling, and he pondered why they didn’t understand that’s not how to pick up a girl. Of course, I had to provoke him and ask him what the true way was. He obviously doesn’t know, because he plays the guitar and has an awesome body so girls just fall on his lap for the most part. But here are my lists of don’ts on how to hit on girls.
1. Do not bring up her body. If you just met her, or you’re not far into conversation, you probably don’t want to tell her how great she looks in that dress. It’ll come off as piggish and that all you’re after is her ass (even if that’s all you are after). Maybe an “I love your smile” would be a bit more appropriate, because girls have other features other than their tits and ass you know.
2. Do not bring up her ethnicity. Yeah, yeah, you LOVE her ethnicity’s food, you’ve dated a girl with the same ethnicity as her, you’ve always wanted to visit her country, etc. etc. etc. Basically, you just come off as a fetishist. No one wants to come off as a fetishist. Just think about it. Your first impression on her will be “The guy who likes latinas.” Also, even though her food and country make up her culture, does that really say anything about her? And who gives a fuck who you’ve dated in the past. Think wisely.
3. Do not pretend you met her before. This by far is one of the cheesiest lines to date. It’s a bit reminiscent of the latest episode of Modern Family, but the true nostalgia hits when I remember the first time I ever got hit on. It was my freshman year of high school, and I was waiting outside for my mom to come pick me up. This guy approaches me asking me if I’m so and so’s cousin and if we met before. He drags it on for 10 more minutes, detailing where we could have met (THE TEEN CLUB OF ALL PLACES), what my “cousin” looked like, when it was, etc. Being an ignorant girl, I was just so confused. Who was this guy? Is there some lookalike out there? What is going on? Then he asks for my number, and it finally clicked. Don’t do this. She’ll either be confused like me, or she’ll know what’s up your sleeve.
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