It’s a diet and exercise regimen that requires no diet and no exercise. xDD It’s a way of convincing myself that I’m doing something for the weight I gained when I ate four plates of food with ice cream for dessert twice a day at NYU. Surprisingly, I’ve lost all the weight and then some. Best diet of my life.
Not that I’ve ever gone on a diet. I have no will power.
I was talking to my dear friend, Timmy, last night, and conversation sort of took a serious turn. Then he plainly asks me, “Okay, Mary, what do you want?” I was sort of taken aback by this question. What do I want? And then I ask, “… in what?” And he told me just to answer it however I took it.
I didn’t know how to take it, let alone know what I really wanted. All I know is that I want a well-paying job as the foundation of my life, but other than that, I haven’t even fathomed what I wanted. As traditional in society, I’ve always assumed I’m getting married, but I’m really iffy about kids. Depending on what career I choose, family isn’t a really stable idea at the moment. I want the house, the car, whatever, but that’s just materialistic.
I can’t think of any significant thing that I actually want that isn’t part of the stereotypical American dream. Everything I could think of was spoon-fed to me by the society I live in. Am I unable to decide what I really want?
Preferably T.I., because his raps are so smooth, but I digress.
Rappers live a glamorous life. However, that’s not why I would want to be a rapper. Rappers live in such an elite and distinct class of society. They get away with things that normal people in normal society could never do.
For example, I could openly boast about my belongings, how sexy my body is, and how much money I have without people judging me. If i were to do that in real life people would think I’m arrogant and pretentious. How many people have really thought, “Bloody Hell! 50 Cent is so cocky! He’s just so full of himself!” None that actually listen to rap.
I could also wear a 300 dollar t-shirt that just has YSL printed down the front, True Religion jeans with the obnoxious pocket design, a Rolex, and carry a Chanel. No one would think anything of it. I wouldn’t be flashy; I’d just be a rapper.
Every other single would be my profession of love to Grey Goose and Patron. In real life, I would just look like vapid, drunken trash, i.e.: Ke$ha, who is not a rapper but a talker who uses autotune.
I could start beef with other rappers, write songs about it, and make snide remarks at award shows. Why? Because they live on the other coast, or simply, I’m just better than them.
There is no such thing as contradictory. In one album, I could rap about how much I love someone that I could marry him, never hurt him, etc, and also rap about how I’m cheating because the sex isn’t good. Even my music videos would contradict the song, but who cares? Drake did it with Best I Ever Had with the extremely blessed (or plastic) women stretching sexily while he’s rapping about how wonderful his girlfriend is, emphasizing more emotion than aesthetics.
Shallowness would never be looked down upon. Sir Mix-A-Lot rapped about big butts, and every other rapper has their music videos flooded with gorgeous women. Never would I have to back up a shallow statement with, “But I like his personality, too!” ever again.
I can openly talk about sex, talk about how good I am, how much you want it, etc. I could talk about how awesome your body is, how good you feel, etc. However, if I wasn’t a rapper, I’d just be a whore.
If I was a rapper I could escape all these social taboos. Literally, I wouldn’t give a fuck.
