Well thanks to my business writing course, I’ve been able to pick up a couple fancy phrases—“ethical egoist” being one.  To be an ethics egoist, one must take advantage of every opportunity and situation encountered despite ethical implications.  If it’s beneficial to oneself, one must do it, and asks oneself, “Why not?”

Today, I have decided I am an ethical egoist.

Situation:

I went to sushi tonight, and the waitress didn’t read all sides of the sushi order, so she completely missed everything I ordered.  Complete aside, but she was a ditz and her head was too big for her body or vice versa, however you want to look at it.  Anyway, halfway through the meal, I realized I hadn’t received my order yet, and I brought it to her attention.  She told me it was probably coming, and a couple minutes later she informed me that there were no more orders.  I told her what I ordered, and she proclaims, “Oh, on the back!” =.=

I end up getting my order of sushi by the time everyone is FINISHED with theirs.  The tab comes out, and since she forgot in the first place, she forgot to ring it up on the tab.  I found myself not inclined to bring it up, so I got my order free.  She shouldn’t have been such a dumb ass and she should pay more attention to detail.  Plus, the service was so shitty; she didn’t deserve any extra tip.

So I finished my latest KDrama, and it was relatively enjoyable.  Although it had your basic plot line and your good-looking actors and actresses, it was a bit different.

There was a LOT less passive-aggressiveness in this drama.  Now, every drama is usually characterized by indirect conversations, passive-aggressiveness, conniving bitches, and your frequent case of cancer.  Now that being said, I don’t know why I like watching drama.  I hate all of those.  They’re ugly and annoying traits in people (besides the cancer obviously).  They all just frustrate me, especially the passive-aggressiveness.

Passive-aggressiveness has to be the most annoying trait in people.  The thing I don’t understand about passive-aggressiveness is that passive-aggressive people let people know they’re annoyed or angry; however, they refuse to talk about it.  They refuse to resolve your problems but they’ve decided them being important enough to display.

Classic case of passive-aggressiveness: when a girl has something wrong with her and someone asks her what’s up, she answers in the coldest tone, “I’m fine.” 

They WANT people to ask them what’s wrong.  They WANT people to know.  They’re just being a fucking drama queen and attention whore.  They want to tell people, but they want to wait until asked. 

No, passive-aggressive people.  Stop being annoying.  You don’t get shit done.

Don’t get your hopes up, and you will never be disappointed.

In my opinion, disappointed is by far the worst sentiment.  It’s a taste of failure and crushed hopes all in one.  I used to be an optimistic person, thinking nothing can go wrong. 

But then my world came crashing down when my father cheated on my mother.

I could trust nothing to go the way I wanted.  I became a complete cynic.  I stopped having faith in anything or anyone.  It worked for the better, because I no longer would be disappointed.  People would only impress me, rather than let me down.  I never had expectations of anything, so that if things don’t turn out, my hopes weren’t crushed. 

I guarded myself from disappointment, because I couldn’t handle the pain. 

Here’s to my mother, who has put up with all my shit for my entire life.  I’ve been a dramatic, know-it-all, arrogant, callous bitch from day one, and I’m surprised my overemotional, sympathetic, and empathetic mother never got tired of me.

She and I are the same in only aspects that cause us to clash.  Both of us are stubborn as hell and like to hear ourselves talk.  Thank you for these traits, because without them, I wouldn’t be the persistent female I am today.

I’ve always been the princess in the family.  I’m the first daughter, and my dad grew such a preference to me, so I always had to have what I wanted.  She always gave in, almost every single time.  Thank you for putting up with my spoiled antics.

I always tried to live up to her standards, but I never put in enough work.  I always had goals that aligned with hers for me, but I never worked hard enough to get them.  I guess that’s part of my arrogance.  I’m sorry for not making you as proud as you should be.

Happy Mothers’ Day!